Getting there

I know it has been almost 2 months since I have posted last, but I wanted to write a short update on what has been going on. Honestly, I have been going non-stop between school, part-time tutoring, Mary Kay, and trying to get involved at church. I am so overwhelmed!! I long so much to get the hang of the school part so I can give more to the other, but it is taking much longer this year than it ever has before. My precious students are extremely needy and chatty. It is so hard to make them understand the importance of listening to learn or hear instructions. A second after I say what I need to say, they come up tapping me on the hip or back and asking what to do. I have gotten to the point now that I tell them to ask a neighbor because I found myself repeating every instruction about 5-6 times. By the time they all got the instruction, it was time to move on. I am working on instilling more independence in this group, but man....we have a LONG way to go!!!! They have honestly gotten so much better this week, but still working on ceasing the talking long enough to get their work done or listen to what I need to tell/teach them. Hopefully, all of the signed papers will be returned this week, so that I can get those stacks turned in. I know that these things are the normal tasks of a teacher, but for some reason this year seems so much more demanding of my energy than past years. It could have something to do with the fact that I plan Math and we have a new book as well as curriculum. Again, it will get better...I just wanted to vent and share what has been going on.

I know that God is seeing me through all of this. I hope that his light is somehow shining through the mess I feel like I am right now. I just don't feel like I am doing much good for God or others when I feel like I am a disaster myself. I feel like I am constantly striving to grow in Him, but can't get to the top of this deep valley. God has never left my side and I know that, but I just feel that I have not revealed the true character of God in all that I do. Please pray for me as I am searching to relight the fire inside of me to grow in Him and share with anyone I come in contact with the true beauty and love of my Lord and Savior!! I miss having my youth group buddies, college friends, and family around to help push me, encourage me, and hold me accountable. Kristy is an amazing roommate, constantly finding ways to help in all of these areas, but one person cannot do it all...community is the key!! I am so lucky to have her here with me on a daily basis doing life, so I am shouting out to her right now for being so supportive, patient, and encouraging while I am going trying to climb out of this valley. Thank you, Roomie!!